Rediscovering the "Old" Me

Growing up, everything is about YOU. The classes you take, the extra curriculars in which you participate, who your friends are, what you're doing after graduation, who you are dating, where you are living, adventures you're going on, etc. Then, as you get married and start families it is no longer about you. It's about your spouse/significant other, kids, pets, and so on.

Well, over the last couple of years I have been feeling lost in myself. I missed who I was before family. I was outgoing, relaxed, fairly organized, read a lot, loved going out and liked trying new things. Now, with the kids (and a busy husband), its all about who's hungry, who needs to go potty, what chores need to be done, wrangling them in and out of the store/car; and the hubby is doing homework or on-call or traveling for work, etc.

What does this all equate to? NO "Me" time. Despite having everything I thought I wanted, I was very depressed. Realizing this depressed me even more-what was wrong with me?! I should be happy! After a lot of thought, I decided I needed to make some changes.

This blog is one of those changes. I decided to go "back to my roots" so to speak and rediscover myself. Notice, I'm not trying to reinvent myself. I don't need to become a new person, but I do want to become the person I enjoy being. That includes doing things I liked to do before (when it was all about "me") and finding new ways to incorporate those things into my ever-busy life.

By writing more, I am thinking more. I used to love writing about EVERYTHING. How am I incorporating writing into my life now? I have a journal for each of my sons and I periodically (about once a month) write in them about the things they are doing, words they are saying, activities they enjoy, and so on.  As mentioned in a previous post, I bought an awesome planner that I write in (with colorful pens for fun) to help me be more organized, but also to write lists (which is a former passion of mine, haha). And, of course, I am writing this blog! Having the blog helps me to think of things I want to share with others through the written word. It's been rather rejuvenating for me!

I love to read! I used to buy every book I thought looked good and would read it fairly quickly. My dream was to have a library of my own in my home someday. When I got married, my husband was shocked at how many boxes of books I had and shared his thoughts on having so many...he'd rather not have them. He's not against reading or even purchasing books, but he didn't like how cluttery it made things and how much space they took up for something you rarely use. I can see the wisdom in that. He's really into technology (an IT Guy always is, right?) so he helped me get set up with reading apps and it has made all the difference! I still buy a hardcopy book every now and then, but I've gotten better at either checking books out of the library or buying digital copies instead. It's fun! I have a MASSIVE library now and the only space it takes is the memory on my phone/tablet. I can read when I'm nursing, rocking kids at night, sitting at the doctors office or in line. It has been so fun to be able to read again! Juggling a baby and a phone is much easier than juggling a baby and a book. Trust me.

Something else I am working on this year is developing talents/skills. The one I'm currently working on is crocheting! My wonderful grandmother came down for Thanksgiving and she taught me how to crochet. I've enjoyed it so much, I am opening an Etsy store called Blossoming Seed (see what I did there?) to sell my creations (which currently consists of baby bonnets and beanies). It has been so fun learning something new and discovering that I am actually decent at it! Its very encouraging.

My point? I think it can be summed up as follows:

No matter what is distracting you from yourself, keep to your roots and never stop growing!